Sunday, July 22, 2007

Ramble #2

What is the plural of nemesis? Is it nemesises? Nemesey? Nemesei? Nemesay? Nemesis? Nemeses?...Computer says, nemeses. That's awkward... Computer is now my nemesis.

Imagine the first time somebody gave someone else flowers. "So.. um.. what do I do with them? Cos like.. I could have eaten chocolates or worn a ring but... I'm just supposed to look at them?" (It's amusing to note that I made the face the person talking would have made - the whole time I typed this. Not amused? Whatever. You and computer are now my nemesises. I mean nemesey. I mean enenemies.)

Your in-laws are so because they are related through lawful marriage. So say you're in a long-term relationship, and you're pretty much married, just not actually by law. Is my girlfriend's mum my out-law? Mum-out-law? It probably helps if she's a cowboy.

As if you shorten madam to ma'am. That's like shortening radar to ra'ar. And that just sounds like I'm roaring. WHICH I AM.

It's strange that I can't write "Tell me where it is when it is ready," as "Tell me where it's when it is ready," and make sense, but I can as, "Tell me where it is when it's ready." Its contradictory nation is creating a lot of confuzzlingness.

Can you actually run someone into the ground? Like... actually chase them until they fall over, and then just run on top of them until they're a good 10 or so metres into the ground?

Man screaming while turning into a duck: oh...my...gosh..arrghrgARGRAGHRAGHAHAHRGHARGHARGHARGHARGHquack

9 comments:

  1. You is craaaaazy.
    Hooch is crazy.

    But funny, you should record your brain one day, if that were possible.

    I would have thought that the plural of nemesis is nemeses... NEM-eh-seas.

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  2. Well, I have come, once again, with all the answers you need to these questions. You will need to rant no more.
    1 - The plural of nemesis is memesiss. That one was obvious.
    2 - Chocolate is for eating, rings are for wearing, flowers are for smelling. Imagine the first time somebody tried to give sombody a free steak knife.
    ...School bell just went... will finish this comment at a later date.
    ps. Yes, you are correct, Grammatically Correct Man does not go to school. He is just observing other students, and correcting all their mistakes. I must now go and watch.
    Goodbye.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Em: I wish I had a brain-recording device. It would probably amuse me more than it would you.

    GCM: You are an imposter, for your comment still contains mistakes. The GCM would not write such errors into his masterwork. What about if I gave you plastic flowers?

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  4. Flowers are a away of saying:

    "hey i like you, have something useless"

    In which the obvious response is:

    "Cool! Lets have sex!"


    NB: As well as flowers try sexpanther. It was 60% of the time, everytime.

    Sam "anonymous" M

    ReplyDelete
  5. Sam: Awesome comment! Let's have sex!...

    Sex panther made me laugh. Once again... you needed someone to proofread your comments.

    Ah young samwise. When will you learn?

    ReplyDelete
  6. In continuation...
    3 - If you are a cowboy, that means you are in a relationship with a cow, but cannot marry it, because it is a cow. That is why you have heard "out-law" used in many western movies. In effect, you are correct about your out-law speculations.
    4 - I was eaten by a radar. But only after it roared at me.
    5 - "Tell me where it's when it's ready." Is the correct shortening. Use it.
    6 - "Run someone into the ground." is a figure of speech. Not grammatically correct. Do not use it.
    7 - Grammatically Correct Man is sometimes in a rush, and is not aided by Grammatical Proofreader Man. (Also known as Grammatically Corrct Man's apprentice: Grammaticon.)
    8 - Plastic flowers are for losers who cannot afford real flowers. Real flowers are for losers who do not see the logic in purchasing plastic flowers that cost much less.
    9 - Man screaming while turning into a duck: Grammatically undefined. Awesome.
    That is all.
    I shall meet you in another life.
    Or this one.
    Yours Sincerely.
    Grammatically Correct Man.

    ReplyDelete
  7. If you are a cowgirl... does that mean you are in a homosexual trans-species relationship?

    I will use the 'it's' phrase, but it might offend people, and then they might run me into the ground.

    Grammaticon is NOT your apprentice! Grammaticon is a superhero - ruler of Wordworld. With his punctuation attacks, he puts a fullstop on spelling errors. GCM is another superhero in this world. Like a sheriff. We fight the crimes of our evil nemesis (just the one for now) - 12 year old girl. Or should I say... !2 y3@r 0lD GurrrL.

    Quack quack quack.

    ReplyDelete
  8. i thought this was amusing.
    mostly because you already used half of them on me, and now i feel like the guinea pig.
    however i was present in the man turning into a duck, and the run someone into the ground..
    actually.
    i am just awesome.
    your comments are lame.
    dont use them.
    goodBYE.
    xx plj

    ReplyDelete
  9. Haha you're not the guinea pig, you just have been present at a lot of my weird thoughts moments.

    My comments are better than yours. I win.

    plj

    ReplyDelete