Wednesday, February 04, 2009

This Way To Heart Disease...

I have two additions this week to my stalking of bacon ridiculousness. Although, strictly, one is not bacon. Then again, who knows what's inside? Bacon, children, mongeese (true plural?) , apricots, sasquatch? The answer, my friends, will never be known. Except, all of the above.

Number #1:
Sometimes I look at bacon and think: "Wow. This won't do. It doesn't serve as an alarm clock or a suit. What use to me are you?" Clearly, somebody else has too. So they decided to take two pounds of bacon (907 grams for the metrically inclined), season it, add another two pounds of sausage, put on another layer of bacon, some barbecue sauce, smoke, then add one last layer of barbecue sauce. Now this has been blogged one million times, has been in papers all over the place. So the only thing I'm going to add is this: On the website, when you look at the finished product... does it look like a cake made from poo to you too? Either that, or the blood and sweat cake from Matilda.

Bruce Bogtrotter's gonna love this. Don't understand that obscure reference? Well. Then you're going straight to the Chokey.

Number #2:
I'm actually really interested in this one. Since I've still got time before uni, I may just attempt it.

Potato + pig + garden hose + sasquatch.

I am well aware I've wasted my time writing this blog and that there are more meaningful things I could be writing. Stop shouting at me.


  1. That is possibly the grossest thing ever.. Ben, your commitment to bacon never ceases to impress and amaze me.

  2. Haha Kyla, I am ever so surprised that this disgusts you. How could that be?

    If you had to eat one, which would it be?

  3. If I had to eat one, it would probably be the Potato + pig + garden hose + Sasquatch one.

    But. Still.
    I value my relationship with my heart currently.

  4. Yeh that would definitely be my choice too. I don't enjoy bacon that much by itself, let alone wrapped around meat wrapped around more bacon.