Awesome German Expressions #1

Check out this gem from my study today:

"Erzähl mir keine Märchen!" = "Don't piss down my back and tell me it's raining!"

I'm pretty sure that if someone is pissing on your back, both of you have bigger problems than them telling you lies.

Note: Kyla, how'd you like me to attempt a re-use of that last label?

Open

Like many people, I watched the Opening Ceremony. The first hour or so was amazing. The drums were incredible. Movable type was awesome. And then... watching all the countries was none of those things.

The only things that made it amusing were:

• Watching the Chinese girls in white who formed the big circle around the athletes drain in energy, coordination and synchronisation over the two hours of dancing while the athletes walked. By the end, they weren't doing the same moves, or at the same time, and I'm pretty sure half of them were dead inside.
• Being a fashion critic. As if I'm (not) qualified for that.
• When Azerbaijain came out, the cameras did the usual flick to any dignitaries that were in the crowd. They showed a well-dressed man and woman standing next to a grumpy looking boy. He looked like he'd been forced to wear a nice shirt, but he'd untucked it in defiance. He had a combover. He didn't seem to enjoy it. He wasn't smiling and waving when the cameras came on, so the woman (who I assume was his mum) nudged him. He waved, but the sort of weak wave you might give to someone you're not a fan of... and somehow looked even more upset. That's what the Olympics is about right? Unhappy children?...No? Crap.

Weak blog.

Pig in a Blanket

My goodness. Will the madness never end?

Note: I must admit... I laughed at the Why section.

Solitaire

I have recently rekindled my relationship with Solitaire. Don't get me wrong. Minesweeper will always hold a place in my heart. But after one evening when I couldn't finish a single game in about fifty tries, I had to fix the problem.
So: Here's where I stand currently:

And yes. I do want to deal again.

PS. Points to anyone who can spot the must-attend event for August, and then adds themselves to the attending list, then turns up to solve a murder!

PPS. Clue: The murderer isn't you.