Camp

Last week I was helping out on the Serpell Primary School/aka best school in the world Grade 6 camp, alongside LP and MW. Twas a fun weekend of heat, horses, harneses, hats, humour and harassment. Maybe not that last one... but maybe yes.

We were at the Coonawarra Farm Resort in Stratford, with 109 boys and girls, 9 teachers and we 3 volunteers. Basically, we just did whatever the kids did, with a little bit of safety checking on the side. Or, in my case, moving a ladder back and forth, climbing up and down, and helping kids get out of their wedgied harneses at the flying fox. Other than that, we just played games with them like soccer/frisbee/volleyball/I was going to write something mildly humorous here, but it was a bit offensive. End.

Also, there were special events at night. Notables were the movie night, when we watched "The Brothers Grimm", and the disco night. I don't know where they got their perception of 'dressing up' from, but it was about 80% fluoro, 60% short skirts, 10% flashing belts, 40% massive pink eye shadow and 90% boys not caring. Unashamedly, I also wore fluoro? But at least my shirt said something that is from a time closer to the disco era than anything theirs said.

I was mostly impressed with their choice of music/one song that mixed every song in the universe into it. NOT impressed with their choice of dancing. There is some dance called "the shuffle" which they challenged me to do, and it was ridiculous and stupid. It's pretty much the Moonwalk, without the sliding effect that makes it cool. And you only ever go backwards. It's just like marching and waving your hands while going backwards. It requires less talent than Bindi Irwin to do. Apologies to any fans out there.

We formed a circle on the floor. MW calls me a circle addict, because I pretended to breakdance and impress the Year 6's. But that was nothing. The highlight of my night was dancing with a young man named Boris, who is a shy little kid from Hong Kong that doesn't speak much English and doesn't speak much to everyone. He certainly unleashed the dragon that night, because his circle count was up around the 20s, and everyone was shouting "Go Boris!" to the rhythm I can only describe as the same as "Go Ricki!" on Ricki Lake. Sad? I think not. If you know what rhythm I mean, you can join my club. Boris' move was to run on the spot and flail his arms like he was skipping. I'm going to steal it.

Also. A girl got her friend to tell me she likes me. I was totally. impressed. That's how I'm going to propose one day.

Things to know:

• It is annoying to sit on a bus watching Shrek, and have every single line recited to you ten seconds before they happen by the kids sitting behind you.
• My horse Puddles was awesome. It peed on, bit, nudged and farted in the faces of all the other horses. It was also the biggest.
• Teachers are totally not like how I remembered them. It's funny seeing them away from kids.
• Eating toothpaste is apparently the thing to do.
• The camp disco night is like the formal. Getting a date is serious business. Stealing a date is completely legal.
• Do not offhandedly say, "Sure" when a girl asks you to the disco. Especially if you are 19. And she 12. They get upset when you do not walk them into said disco.
• You make it up to them by swinging the skipping rope for them and their friends the next day. Ha.
• "The Brothers Grimm" is a twisted movie. Especially the bit with the Gingerbread Man.
• I hate flies.