Veta-gems

I’m loving Vetamorphus, as always. This year’s group is different to the other years – in that there’s all girls (3), and only one is a Doncaster kid. But it’s been great fun, they’re all massively talkative and hyper, so never a dull moment. There’s been some funny stuff to come out of random conversations, so as I remember them, they may find their way here. Here’s two to get you started.

Girl 1: Hey, did you get a haircut?

Girl 2: Yeh I did, about 6 inches off.

Girl 1: …That’s like half a sub!

(Looking at Genealogy in Matthew)

Girl 1: I think it’s kinda cool to see how Jesus’ ancestors all progressed to that point.

Girl 2: It connects some of the prophesy from the Old Testament.

Boy 1 (Boy no longer there): Gee, it’s lucky all the women involved weren’t infertile.

Silence…

There is also a Casanova puppet show that was done in one of the seminars, but I can’t remember the dialogue. Just know it was perverted and hilarious.

A Resume, A Retreat & A Realisation

So whilst I struggle with the photos of my dirty room/some camera difficulties, here's a little bit of news of things happening in my world.

Resume isn't really the right word, but it was the only way of somewhat keeping meaning whilst filling out the title. Whatever. Youth Vision last week approved my application to become a sponsored Youth Ministry intern at my church. That means I can get paid to do what I love doing, as well as take on some youth ministry study under ACOM, to help me better myself personally and in leadership mad-skillz. This is an answer to some of my prayers lately, as I've been seeking how to chase God and better my relationship with him and others, and get past the annoyingly necessary need for jobs and money to help me get by without leeching off my parents.

The first retreat for Vetamorphus was last weekend. It was a great time away, a very healthy space for real conversations. I told the girls that we have this year (CW, BC, and LD - all champs, also the most easily distracted people ever) that I loved the space we were in, where people could have real conversations with strangers and skip through all the crap that might normally occur when meeting someone. The focus of the weekend was on getting to know your Bible (and so getting to know God better). It was good stuff, as I and so many others constantly need reminding, encouragement and help in exploring the many messages in that old book.

From this retreat, came my realisation. I was interviewed as an ex-student, now leader, on the retreat. I was asked about where I was at coming into Vetamorphus, how it affected me, and where I'm at now. It was after reflecting on this that I had my massive realisation. A few years ago, I prayed one of those prayers you pray when everything's turned to poo. The sort of desperate, pleading, pathetic prayer, where I actually got on my knees, in the dark, and prayed for a long time. I asked for my life to change, for me to become a better person, for social justice to become something I cared about more than trying to impress people (or more like, for God to help me as I attempted to make caring about others part of my life). Lots of stuff. It was long, intense, and a time when I genuinely was relying on God. Four years on, I am working in ministry; I love making people and serving them my priority; I am passionate about social justice; I struggle constantly with my faith and God, but it makes my life more worthwhile. My prayers have been answered, and I'm in a massively good place at the moment. Just happier, less stressed. I still know that life has ups and downs, but I'm happy to sit and reflect and work through the downs until the good times happen again.

I'm in such a great space and I'm very grateful that I'm in it. God's been good to me and it makes me want to be good to others.

Half-Yearly

We're not exactly half way through the year, but here's some stuff I've been thinking about.

I've halfway through my course! That's crazy man.

Life is awesome. I'm pretty sure that now I write that, I'll become more aware of something crap, but that's ok. God and people around me (familiar and strange) have always gotten me through.

Africa Aid, Elev8, everything are whipping me in meetings, work, planning, etc. I love it. I'm tired. I'm excited.

I'm also excited to be starting boxing on Friday. Since it's a trial first, I'm hoping that it's fun and challenging and that we can keep on doing it. Otherwise, we'll just move on to something else.

I've also been playing lots of basketball lately with little brother. We ball hard... / pretend.

I have watched listened to this song four times straight. Haha, twice on MySpace, twice on YouTube. Awesome? I think you'll agree. It makes me want to have another crack at guitar and song writing. See below below below.

I ran a Veta session on Monday that, apart from being an awesome meal together that we all cooked dishes for, had a great sharing environment for open and honest discussion of our years so far. I asked three questions: "What has been a highlight for the year?", "What is something you've been struggling with?", and "What is something you're looking forward to?" I can't remember my answers, so here are new answers.

1) I've got lots of highlights. I'm very thankful for the healing of my skin.

The new challenges in the things I do, especially of Africa Aid, have been really rewarding when achieved, and just makes me more excited to tackle the next. Of course, I get tired, but that just leads to another highlight - the continual support, encouragement and love shown to me by my family, friends, K, and all others in my life.

I'm also starting to think seriously about music again (or probably, for the first time), and I'm motivated to try and become a better musician because I want to make something beautiful, not because I want to impress or anything other pretentious feelings I might have had in the past. Besides, what I can do isn't really that impressive.

Finally, last year didn't end on a great note in terms of some friendships in my life, but this year has been full of new friendships or growing of some into even more meaningful and valuable parts of my life.

2) I told my Veta group that I've been struggling with fear. I think it's more like insecurity. I get so caught up in doing things and taking on projects that I forgot my limits and capabilities. I like to think I'm a fairly capable individual, but I can't be so ignorant as to think I can do everything. I need people. Other people do things better than me. Unfortunately, in the midst of organising, planning, stressing, I forget to delegate or ignorantly/arrogantly think that if I don't do something, it won't get done; or that if I let someone else do it, it won't be done well. So, I stress and take on stuff, and then what I fear is that I won't be able to reach the goals that I set. Realistically, if I trust my teams and support, who are all awesome people that, when I think about it in this frame of mind, would definitely be able to take on those projects...we could do really great things. Much bigger than what we're aiming at now... But let's not get ahead of ourselves. So. Trust. Fear. Insecurity.

Also, I get annoyed at catching up with friends. I'm crap at it. Because there is a group of friends that I see on a regular basis, it's easy to become complacent and not try hard with the others. Then I get discouraged if I do try to organise something and whoever I'm trying to meet cancels or isn't free, etc. It's irrational. I need to be better at it.

As I wrote in 'Vocation', I have been thinking on and off about how much I have to give up or need to sacrifice to be able to properly serve God and people. Perhaps it's not that I have to give up everything, but I think it's an indicator of my consciousness telling me that I'm probably spending too much time and money thinking about material things that aren't really necessary. This year I've come into more money than previously and it seems to disappear so easily. Even if I don't give up everything, I should make sure I control myself and keep my irrational desires in check.

3) I'm looking forward to the Philippines. I know my eyes will be opened, I know I'll be challenged, I know I'll get angry, I'll be inspired, I'll be hurt. It'll be good for me and I'm also looking forward to spending time with the team.

I'm starting to read more and write more, like I used to, and I love it.

I look forward to sport, because I miss it and it makes me happy.

I'm looking forward to growing more relationships and meeting more people, especially at uni.

Red Frogs will be interesting.

Summer. I'm hoping that all the hype I built up in my head of freedom when I got my license will actually somewhat exist. Ha.

So that's that. I'd love to know your answers on highlights, struggles, points to look forward to. Hope your 2008 is going great, that you're able to tackle your challenges as they come, and that the rest of the year will be beautiful. Peace.

Blank Check

Just back from an interesting weekend at Phillip Island, on the Vetamorphus retreat. Still working out what I want to say about it or if I want to say anything. Some positives, some struggles; some rational, some not. I'm really just drawing blanks on anything to write down from that adventure.

In the meantime, this guy tried to forge a $360 billion check. Probably the smartest criminal in the word. If not, then it's this guy:

100 Things About Me

I saw this somewhere. And decided to see what 100 things I would say about myself, and if anyone was remotely interested in them.

1. I was born on 12th September, 1988. Mercy Hospital in Melbourne...
2. Exactly 9 months after Mum and Dad's wedding anniversary...
3. My middle name means 'Powerful Ocean'. My last name means 'Strong'. My Mum's maiden name (Ong - I know... not much of a change there) means 'Royalty'. My first name is Benjamin, which means 'on the right hand of God' or 'favourite son'. So, by my logic, my name means I am the favourite son, with the strength of an ocean, who sit on the right hand of God like royalty? Bit arrogant if you ask me. Hooray for Asian names.
4. Speaking of Asia, being born in 1988 makes me, in the Chinese Zodiac, an Earth Dragon.
5. Being born in September makes me a Virgo.
6. I don't believe in horoscopes or zodiacs.
7. I have two brothers. One older, one younger.
8. I have a mum, she's from Malaysia.
9. I have a dad, he's from Singapore.
10. I consider myself an Australian. I don't really call myself Chinese.
11. I have been in six different countries for at least a day: Australia, Germany, USA, Malaysia, Singapore, Thailand.
12. I don't remember Thailand.
13. The countries I most want to visit are Egypt, Spain and anywhere in Africa.
14. I did a three month exchange to Erlenbach am. Main in Germany. I can still speak German.
15. I was part of the Global Young Leaders Conference 2005 in Washington and New York.
16. I was super shy and introverted before those two trips.
17. Now I'm not.
18. Up until now, I have wanted to be: Policeman, astronaut, doctor, paediatrician, teacher, minister, charity worker, missionary, Lego employee.
19. I currently want to be all of the last five, and I'm working on it.
20. I have been at Doncaster Church of Christ my whole life.
21. I'm a Christian, originally just because I tagged along with Mum and Dad to church.
22. I started properly believing and asking my own questions in Grade 6, 2000.
23. Then again in 2006.
24. 2006 was a big learning and growing up stage for me. One of the reasons was Vetamorphus, a young Christian ministry course.
25. Most of my closest friends did that course with me. Actually that's probably not true anymore. The first time I started writing this was in March 2007. It's a bit sad really.
26. I do a youth ministry internship at my church.
27. I lead a small group at church called The Garage, which consists of boys between Year 5 and 10.
28. I helped found and now run a charity (in progress). It's called Africa Aid. It was started in 2005. This year we are trying to raise $30,000 for a school in Southern Uganda. Check out the Myspace or Facebook for more details.
29. I am very unorganised in general, but also with Africa Aid. It makes me feel bad, and making it bigger and maintaining it scares me.
30. I am employed as an Integration Aide and as a Small Group Leader for Elev8. It's very necessary since...volunteer work doesn't pay child support.
31. Lucky I don't have to.
32. I went to Serpell Primary School until Grade 5.
33. I went to Trinity Grammar School for the rest of it.
34. I study 2nd Year Arts at Monash University.
35. I play touch rugby at Monash.
36. I also do dancing with a group of friends at Monash.
37. I have a girlfriend, who is rather pleasant. She has a nice smile and good oral hygiene. Sometimes she gives me muffins, but not so much anymore. She is also fun to chase. We have been going out for almost 3 years.
38. I prefer trackpants over jeans.
39. I would like to collect t-shirts, shoes or hats...if I had the money.
40. My favourite food is most likely spaghetti bolognese, but I've never decided for sure.
41. When I go out to eat, I still look at what comes with chips first.
42. I love peach ice tea.
43. I also love Choc-Mint/Bubblegum with nuts at Cold Rock. I ordered it the last 10 times I've been there.
44. I have been to Cold Rock 10 times.
45. I love most desserts in general, except pavlova. It's a devil cake. First it looks good, and then you have one bite, and it tastes stupid again.
46. I do not like quite a few things: Tomatoes, mushrooms, asparagus, avocado, grapes, rocket lettuce (not to be mistaken with iceberg lettuce, which I love), egg yolk, fried eggs, sultanas and cheese to name a few.
47. I struggle to not eat three times the suggested serving size if I'm eating chips or biscuits. But really, that's because the suggested serving size is ridiculous... eg. four biscuits.
48. I play the piano, which I learnt for 10 years. Now I play for fun on a regular basis.
49. I used to play the flute, which I learnt for 5 years.
50. I can also play the melodica, which is an awesome instrument.
51. I attempted to teach myself guitar, but got lazy. I want to learn still.
52. I also want to learn the harmonica, the banjo, the ukelele, bass guitar, double bass, and the steel drums.
53. I like to imagine I can sing but that doesn't make me awesome. I just sing to myself all the time.
54. Like most people, I have an eclectic taste in music that is not really definable. I just like what I like. My favourite band is Lazy Susan, and I'll give you a dollar if you sing me one of their songs.
55. In my life I have played or participated in gymnastics, swimming and basketball competitively (for a club). I also played basketball and soccer for my school.
56. I have a third place from the National Gymnastics comp and a second from the State.
57. I had to quit because I was too small. To stay on would have meant three years of training until I hit puberty and was as big as the other boys in my level.
58. I have no pets, but used to have a big German Shepherd called Rex. He was actually called Sultan, which is a pretty cool name, but... us boys were young. And Rex seemed more dog-like.
59. I also used to have a baby chicken called Timothy. One day Timothy escaped outside and saw Rex. He had a heart attack and died.
60. I do not have a favourite colour. At least, not one I could say without feeling I was being unfaithful to the other colours.
61. I love the game Taboo.
62. I also love Risk.
63. Like the colours, I don't know if I could say my favourite movie. There are lots up there.
64. Disney holds a special place in my movie love.
65. I once played Yoko Ono in a musical about John Lennon.
66. I love Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares. It's awesome.
67. Amongst some other things I would like to learn are photography, video filming and editing, photoshopping and other digital imagery, cooking (especially pastry cooking) and surfing.
68. I love to read, although I don't read as much as I did when I was little. No real favourite authors, but I do like Nick Earls a bit. Terry Pratchett too.
69. When I was little, I would go to the library and before checking for any other books, I would go to the Childrens - Humour section first to see if there were any Garfield books in.
70. This year I am going to the Philippines on a mission trip with International Needs.
71. I am passionate about issues of social justice and equality.
72. In the last few years, I have done some work with the MakePovertyHistory campaign. I was an Ambassador at the concert in November '06 and a Group Leader on the ZeroSeven Road Trip in 2007.
73. I enjoy writing. It's one of those things that I love to do, but procrastinate over doing. I've been working on a few pieces for the last few years, but not as in actively working on. Just starting, and then leaving for a long time, until I've forgotten the ideas that made me want to write them in the first place.
74. I once won a competition for writing. I felt like I'd plagiarised something I'd read but couldn't remember.
75. I have recently developed a fascination at other people's obsessions with things. Most notably, bacon. Examples are here, here, here and here.
76. I once had a phobia of heights. I was too scared to even go down the slides at playgrounds. After I started gymnastics, that left. I don't really have a phobia now.
77. The first thing I notice on the opposite sex is their face.
78. I like playing computer/video games. GTA: San Andreas is my favourite, followed closely by Mario Kart and Minesweeper.
79. According to some website where you submit your monthly best Minesweeper score, I was third in the world. For one glorious month. I'm all washed up now. It's all downhill from here.
80. I'm not interested in cars in the slightest. Shiny round ones attract my interest though. But not Volkswagen round, they're too small.
81. I like Hummers, but it has nothing to do with them as a car, and definitely not to do with their contribution to the environment. It's part of a game we played when I was in America.
82. I have shinier than average fingernails. Unsure why.
83. I dislike cats. It comes from a deep relationship of mistreatment between the two of us that began in Germany. I was patting a cat, I wanted to get up and leave, cat scratched my face, I punched cat, cat disappears for two days, I thought I'd killed it. Cats are not as good as dogs.
84. If I was an animal, I think I'd be a mongoose.
85. My favourite animal used to be the Eastern Quoll, just to be different. I have no idea what my favourite is anymore.
86. I would love to work with animals, but I doubt it would ever happen. I saw a documentary once about people who have moved to go live with orphaned elephants and look after them. I would love to do that, but there's also a million other things I'd like to do.
87. I can type at an average of 109 words per minute. Mavis Beacon tells me so.
88. I have attempted to read the entire Bible in one year, but failed miserably. I think it had to do with trying to read it in order, no dedication, and just kinda rushing through it. I would like to one day accomplish this.
89. I have a dream of travelling with friends in a bus. I've wanted to do it since I was about 8. With cars, what attracts me is the number of seats, followed by cupholders.
90. I have had a fascination with learning everything I could since childhood. Not exactly school things, but random facts of information. One of my favourite books ever was 1001 Amazing Facts, and I would tell people facts from the book at random. I used to do extra projects on things like Volcanoes and Pirates...just for fun.
91. I like learning about history and important people of the past.
92. I keep a list of people that I need to read and learn about.
93. I enjoy public speaking. I used to be scared of it, and so my job on the debating team was to write the speeches.
94. I like comedy, it's my favourite genre of movies and books. Mostly. My favourite comedians include Demetri Martin, Jason Byrne, Steven K Amos, Mitch Hedburg and Dave Chapelle.
95. Doing stand-up is one of the scariest things I can think of, and I'd like to do it once in my life.
96. My three most visited websites are Hotmail, Facebook and Blogger. That's not very exciting, so the next three are CollegeHumor.com, JakeandAmir.com, and YouTube.com.
97. Before I die, I would like to do most extreme sports, learn the above listed things I want to learn, meet Nelson Mandela, go to a home game at Anfield, see the LA Lakers and the Detroit Redwings, and many others.
98. I recently made the transition from standing to sitting when I wipe.
99. I STILL shout at the kids on game shows for being stupid... even though I'm almost 20.
100. This blog took 443 days to write. I'm glad it's over.

Reasons Why My Church Would Benefit From Doing Vetamorphus (Updated:Work in progress)

This is based off a passing comment I made once, after all the frustrations I had with whinging and seemingly 'eyes-closed' Christians who are comfortable just using the church for its services, etc. and never asking questions or giving back. I feel like I come across very 'high and mighty' sometimes, I hope I'm not. This is just a major irritation for me. Now I understand that the ten things I'm going to say can be found through many other avenues, but I feel closest to Vetamorphus, so I'm going from there. I also realise that Vetamorphus wouldn't give the same things to me as everyone else, but I'm sure if a bit of effort was put into engaging it, they would definitely receive from it.

1) The close friendships that form. Especially in the small groups, where you specifically meet with the same people each week and share the deepest parts of your weekly life, thoughts and beliefs. This sort of openness, I think, will usually lead to good friendships, and it did. However, the retreats that combined all the groups from across Victoria were also awesome, and some of my good friends are also from those. Too often at church or youth group or even the Garage group, I see people - Christian or not - who look left out and seem as if there's nobody there for them to be able to talk to. I must confess, often I don't even make an effort to reach them, because I'm comfortable where I am with my friends. However, I've resolved to start trying to look out for and be a friend to the 'outsiders'. Because they're as equal to God as I or my friends are, so I should treat them that way.

2) Seeing and listening to other people's beliefs. Even if we all came under the Christianity umbrella. Vetamorphus opened my eyes to the huge array of beliefs and thoughts that different Christians possess, as individuals and as members of different denominations (and even of my own). Some things scare me, such as huge event evangelism, spiritual gifts such as tongue speaking and prophecising, as this is what my non-Christian friends tease me about and get the wrong idea of Christianity from. If I had not done Vmorph, and just stayed in my church, I would have been sheltered from all these other approaches to Christianity and worship. I'm still scared of them in a sense, but seeing the people who openly embrace those things was a real eye-opener. They seem so much more in-tune spiritually than I have ever felt. I remember times before Vmorph when I made jokes with other people from church about that sort of stuff. I feel bad about it now, because I would have continued doing that probably, if not for last year. Just the fact that I was exposed to all these extra elements to faith showed me that there's a whole lot more growing for me to do, and not to sit back and let things happen to me - I should be making things happen.

3) Helps one to realise their leadership potential. Part of the course requirements for Vetamorphus are that you actively engage in a ministry for 40 hours, and a live-in ministry for another 40. While one may take on a ministry simply to fill the requirements, by the end of it, you realise the impact you're having on other people, and just how capable you are of it. There are so many people, me included, who are happy to coast along and never give back to others. Part of it, at least for me, is laziness, but it used to be that I didn't see myself as able to, or 'worthy' enough to do something for others. Now, thanks partially to Vetamorphus, I know that I'm more than capable of a lot of things that I can't even imagine, and so is everyone else.

4) Mentors. I think mentors would benefit so many people at church, and outside too. Just the ability to sit and talk about life intentionally with someone who is more experienced, usually older, and who sees life from a different angle to you, is such a cool thing. For me, my mentor approaches faith and life in a bit of a different way then I do, but I respect his ways and his person so much. Mentoring gave me the chance to open up and build a friendship based on trust from the very start with someone I didn't know that well. For all the people at church, whether involved in their own friendship groups or still relative loners, mentors would be a great help, and the opportunity for them to mentor others would also be an eye-opener, and a way for them to be self-empowered.

5) Benefit on community. This one kinda goes with number 3. While everybody who does Veta is given a chance to exercise their leadership, clearly the community they are reaching out to will benefit from their efforts. Sure, sometimes efforts don't end up the way they were intended, but when more and more people are exercising leadership (whether that's outright or by following and helping others) with good intentions, good things are bound to happen.

6) Faith exploration. Up until last year, I almost never read my Bible. Ever. I'm so action-centred that I rarely leave time for self reflection and reading. I enjoy it, heaps, but I just never seem to do it. Although I didn't put as much into the readings as I could have (something I'll try to change), all the other ways Veta helped me ask my questions, voice my thoughts, hear others' opinions and just explore faith in different ways helped me to grow up a lot. I feel like I was so blind just coming along to church all the time, but never questioning or exploring, just accepting everything. The thing is, I never even imagined there was anything I could question. Although it might sound weird, questioning and wrestling with why I believe the things I believe, and even what I believe, has made things a whole lot clearer for me. I think that there are lots of people at church and outside who never think or bother to question, or dismiss their beliefs as stupid, but they shouldn't. Eveyrone's entitled to their beliefs, and should feel comfortable enough to voice them and question them, and Veta would help our church do that.

7) Different ways of worship. Worship pre-Veta, for me, meant coming to church on Sunday, praying before bed and reading the Bible. Tis what it meant, and I didn't get much out of it. Veta taught me about all the different things I could do to build my faith and others' too. Faith through action, through church life, through community, through reading, through self reflection and meditation. I loved all of it, and it taught me how much more there is to Christianity than I ever knew - and I'm supposedly an 'insider', since I've been going to church my whole life, as opposed to an 'outsider', who doesn't believe in Christianity, and has stereotypical views of it. A major reason why there's so much stupid politics and arguments in church is because people are so set in their ways and traditions. If only they knew how good it is to engage in a new way, someone else's way of worship, and that it could be better for them and the church. Even engaging in other practices of other religions is cool, buddhist meditations and fasting are something I'd like to try, as well as lots of other things.

The Garage '07

Next year, two of my mates - Matt Waters and Jono Croxford - and I are running a small group. It's called The Garage, because we're taking over the garage underneath the church office. None of these silly names like 'KidZone'. It's going to be for the boys in Grade 5 to Year 8. The reason for this is, the boys a bit old for singing childish songs about Jesus and doing silly actions, but maybe not ready for the intensity of something like Vetamorphus or a VCE small group. When I was that age, I pretty much thought I was 'too cool' for church or any of that stuff, mainly because I had nothing to explore in or ask my own questions. It wasn't until this year and Vetamorphus that I've had that, and now that I do, I see how good it would be for the boys to have it too.

After a meeting today with Jono and Matt, we came up with this working vision statement of our six reasons for doing The Garage:

• To help the boys realise their potential as young leaders in church and the wider community
• To present other options in ways of life and support them as they grow into young men
• To create a space to build courage and strength in their ability to help, assist, change, question, answer and be.
• To create a comfortable environment to explore questions of faith.
• To create an environment of trust and support between boys and leaders.
• To be their friends.

I'm really excited about doing this, because I feel I'm finally giving like I should be, rather than just a bit. I hope it'll be good, we'll see. Starting date is Feb 4th, I'll write more about it after then.

And so this is Christmas...

It has been a while since my last post. I've been to Phillip Island for the Young Adults Retreat, I've been to Mt. Martha for my final Vetamorphus Retreat, exam results have come out, I went back to Phillip Island for a week with friends, and now it is Christmas.

The Young Adults Retreat was cool, it was only two days, but a good time anyway. Mostly relaxing, with a little bit of reflection. Kinda weird to be considered an adult now, I still feel pretty childish.

A few days later, I was off to Mt. Martha. The final Vetamorphus Retreat. As always, there were parts, and people, on the weekend that made me angry and frustrated. One particular session, on Christian relationships, as in boyfriend/girlfriend and pre-marital sex, made me especially angry, for reasons I won't put here. If you'd like to know, ask me. Anyway, the best part of the weekend was this: On the final day, in the final session, we did positive affirmations. Everyone sat around in a circle, and as we went around the circle, everyone was given the opportunity to say something affirming about the person whose turn it was. Now, when Vetamorphus started, there were some very big personalities, and, at times, I felt like hitting them over the head with a fish. I found, and still find, it so very easy to pick up all the faults in people. However, these people who I wanted to take out my frustrations on with marine animals, were the ones who found it easiest to see the best in people. They were the ones who were first to affirm others, and the ones to affirm the most. It made me realise that maybe I was the one who needed an attitude change.

Exams results went well. I got 90s, but well over what I was hoping for. So that was nice.

On Friday, I came back from a week at the Jolly Retreat in Phillip Island. There were about 15 people in the house at any given time, and it was just a great week away. As always, there was a little drama, but nothing too damaging. I even found space for quiet time and meditation on the beach. However, the highlight was definitely the Kris Kringle on the last night. It was the best one ever, simply because the presents had effort and care put into them, rather than any care about a money limit. In fact, most of the presents were costfree anyway. The fact that someone had put in a personal effort meant much more than any $10 token present.

Finally, today is Christmas. My brothers aren't home, so it's just me and mum and dad. We don't even have a Christmas tree up. But it doesn't matter, it's been a great Christmas. Reflective midnight service Christmas Eve, big Christmas service this morning, lunch with family friends, dinner with girlfriend, now watching old-school movies.

And now, as I sit here watching the Grumpy Old Men movies, I can safely say it's been a great holiday so far, and quite possibly the best year of my life. All the reasons, I'll write about later, but it's been awesome. So merry Christmas everyone, let's hope next year is even better.

Vetamorphus Homework: New Age Christianity

Scrolling through Mr. Learning Exercise #8, I came upon this:

"When Bono of U2 said, 'I still haven't found what I'm looking for', many evangelicals despaired, thinking that he had lost his way spiritually, but he was quite clear: 'You broke the bonds, you loosed the chains, you carried the cross and my shame. You know I believe it... but I still haven't found what I'm looking for.' This is not a statement of confusion, or spiritual ambivalence: quite the reverse, it is a positive recognition of the frailty of human experience and human comprehension. We all know only in part, we experience only in part, and in a postmodern world it is crucial that we are honest about this limitation."

What does it mean? Well the article talks about today's postmodern society, in which spiritual conversations aren't that hard to come by, and are engaged much more openly than previous generations. It suggests that everyone today has their own journey spiritually, and it's not a matter of one straight path and you at a certain point on it, but a series of encounters and experiences that appear through one's life. Christians believe that God will have been evidently present and at work, and this may be even if the person does not acknowledge a God in their life.

I like this, it's something I put into most of my seminars for Vetamorphus, into my talks at school chapel, into my 'sermon' I did this year. We've all got our own journey, built upon our maturity, understanding, belief, experiences, etc. As a Christian, I've never believed in 'saving' people, or forcing them to believe for fear of being stabbed by devils with tridents... only in sharing and going that journey with them. Yes I believe, but I, too, still haven't what I'm looking for.

Jesus: an example, not an existence?

This is something that popped into my head over Easter, and also before that, after hearing a presentation by Lauren, from my Vetamorphus group, about "What do you think of the Messiah, and who He was?"

Does it really matter if Jesus existed or not? Is my role as a Christian to live to spread the message of being a good person, or is to defend the existence or share the story of Jesus the person? Or is it both? Or do they overlap, and help make each other happen?

At our school Easter service, a dude from TEAR Australia had a chat to us. He spoke about this doctor from Ethiopia, who got the chance to get educated in the USA. However, after becoming a recognised doctor, this guy decided to give up on all the stuff he had in the States, and return to put his knowledge into use in his homeland. He founded the 'Hope' program, which provides everything for children, especially orphans. The message was that it was because of this guy's faith in Jesus that he did these things. But what I took away was this: Does it matter if Jesus existed? Even if he was only a story with a meaning, but not actually historically real, who could discredit such a good thing happening because of a faith in Jesus? Whether or not this faith is in something real, something positive came out of it, so does it matter?

Me personally, I am thinking that maybe one of the roles of a Christian is to try and live the life of Jesus, treating other people right, and in doing so spread our reason. But if I wanted to set any type of example, it would be encourage people to live a good life, even if they don't come to believe. This blog isn't going to be some Christian propaganda thing, it's just stuff I believe in. I'd much rather see a world of people doing good things for others than a world of people feeling uncomfortable with a Christian faith.

The Very First

Well this isn't my first blog, but hopefully it lasts longer than all the other ones. I try to write stuff that means something, but there is the occasional ramble or bit of garbage. I guess I'll just tell you a bit about me, to leave you with a slightly better understanding of who I am.

My name's Benjamin J. Chong. The 'J' could stand for anything from Jellyfish to Judas. But it's not. I'm 18, finishing school and hopefully studying Arts/Theology next year at Monash University and Christian Churches Theological College. I'm a Christian, belong to Churches of Christ, but still trying to understand what that really means. I do a young Christians' VET course, called Vetamorphus, which is pretty mad. I'm also trying to lead a boys aged 9 - 15 small group next year with some mates, if I can make it happen.

I guess my greatest passion is helping those who aren't as lucky as me. I reckon that in I've been blessed, whether by a God or not, with so many good things that I'd be wasting my life if I didn't try to share them with others. I run a student-founded charity called Africa Aid, and we're moving into other schools and churches next year. I hope to someday teach in a school in Africa or do some missionary work, as well as keep the Africa Aid stuff going.

I like soccer, Liverpool FC are favs. Various other liked sports are basketball, ultimate frisbee, footy, dodgeball, lacrosse, gymnastics, volleyball. There's probably more, but it's late.

I also like playing the piano and the odd bit of jazz flute... well, I dabble. Music's pretty cool, this blog is named after a song of probably my favourite band - Lazy Susan. I don't think there's a single song of theirs I don't like. I'm pretty open to most music and I try to know a little bit about who's who and what's good. Ask me.

Well that's about it. I'm sure I'll reveal a bit more about myself as the posts go on.