Burger

Study? Pfft. I am sick of learning about the Weimar Republic and the non-musical Franz Ferdinand. No offense to any mad Weimar Republic fans out there, all power to you. It's just not my thing.

In pursuit of more heart-killing foods and procrastination, I googled (Yes, that is now a verb. Says I, Benjamin "Miriam Webster" Chong.) [Wow, I'm pretty sure that was the first time I've ever put my name on this blog. Not that it was hard to find out anyway, since almost everybody that reads this knows me, or has somehow tracked me down.] {Extra brackets. Now back to the story...} World's Fattest Burger on a whim. This is what I got back.

Now. I'm aware I'm about three years late in terms of the news, but whatever, I was too busy tagging school desks back then to worry about a burger that could eclipse the sun. The Hardee's "Monster Thickburger" is "two 1/3-pound slabs of Angus beef, four strips of bacon, three slices of cheese and mayonnaise on a buttered sesame seed bun" — and it sells alone for $US 5.49, $US 7.09 with fries and a soda. How many calories you ask? ...1,420. I'm almost 95% sure that the gas released from all people that eat this thing is the real cause of global warming. The only thing that's missing from this is the "sweet kiss of chocolate syrup".

To the real issue at hand... somebody please do my exams for me? I'll buy you one of those burgers, and cover it in chocolate myself.